Yes, it’s meant to be.

I’m halfway thru my summer OJT, and I still can’t believe that I got accepted to my one and only company of choice: Summit Media.

Actually, every time people asks me why I want to get in Summit, I can’t come up with a concrete answer. Is it because I’m a fan of Yes!? Is it because I grew up borrowing Candy? Is it because I am so curious about the writing styles of Esquire? Is it because I think I am inclined to writing? Perhaps.

I’ve been bugging my college friend to follow up with Summit HR about my application. Holy Week had ended and still no call received from them. Until I’ve learned that 3 of my classmates already started their internships in Su-effin-mmit. So I started to panic.

Age once asked me: what’s your plan B if Summit didn’t work? My answer? There’s no plan B.

There could have been a couple more of media companies who accepts interns, but really, I didn’t see myself not working in Summit Media.

When the friend referral move didn’t work, I called Summit Media which I should have done the week after Holy Week. And to my dismay, the girl said they no longer accept interns for Mass Comm courses.

I got sad, disappointed, stressed. Did I give up? No. I almost did, yes. But since I have this never say die thinking, I still tried.

When the calling move didn’t work, I went to the Summit office, which should have been my first move.

Even the application process was tedious. Receptionist gave me the usual respond: leave your resume we’ll call you. Good thing she asked about my referral, so played the dropping-of-names card and then, voila! I was interviewed and got accepted that day.

HR guy assigned me to Special Pubs, where I could write copies for all titles. Hooray!

Thanks to my being bull headed, optimistic, lazy ass, firm decisiveness attitude, everything fell into place. Had I applied earlier, I would have landed a department that tasks you to do clerical stuff. Had I not tried hard enough, I wouldn’t score this awesome writing for mag experience.

At the end of the day, it’s all about timing, luck, and attitude.

I Miss You

I miss you. I miss sharing “clay clay” like this with you. I miss leaving them on your desk with a witty sometimes cheesy post-it note. I miss putting them in the “treasure cave” and hinting it’s hidden there. I miss how I refuse to eat the last bite and you, would gladly open your mouth big and engorge it with much delight. I miss the vicarious smile I wear when I see you sheepishly smile every time you see I’m holding a chocolate. I miss you. So bad.

Fickle Minded Me.

Lately, I’ve been wanting to do something new. Something I haven’t tried before, or can also be something I want to give a second try. Like go to a museum, or go on a picnic with friends, or maybe as simple as sitting on a park bench and people watch/contemplate/reflect.

Then something else pops up, or laziness kicks in, and poof!, wala na. “Next time”, I would tell myself.

That desire to do something new is bugging me more and more these days. One of these days, I must do it. Hoping, crossing my fingers, looking forward.

Sweet in a Unique Way

Remembers that spot at the restaurant where you and him sat several months ago.

Buys a moisturized dishwashing liquid because he cares about your hand and appreciates you washing the dishes for him.

Gives you a teargas so you can protect yourself in times of danger.

To wear red means you’re taken. Yellow is something else. Green is single. He wears something close to red. You ask him by whom he is taken, “ikaw”, he answers. Now that’s sweeter.

He answers “in love eh” when you notice he has a pimple. He answers “sa’yo” when you ask him who he’s in love with. Swarm of ants starts to build up now.

Stops working at his laptop for a while when you shout “hug!!” half asleep and then hugs you oh so tigthly.

Brings food at work he cooked himself.

Does not get tired laughing at your antics and even exerts effort mimicking your expressions, no matter how gay they are.

Answers and gives explanations to all your questions whether they’re shallow or thought provoking.

Exerts effort to really listen to your stories even if you talk too fast and has a tendency to eat your words.

Wears hydration belt when he runs with you so you have something to drink when you get thirsty.

Goes to a convenience store when you say you are craving for ice cream.

Asks you where you want to eat as a courtesy. You say a place. He subtly suggests something else. You go to where he suggests. At least he asks you first.

Gives you one long stemmed rose on Valentine’s because he knows a bouquet is heavy and a hassle to bring home.

Boredom Strikes

$I’m on my way to Carmen, Pangasinan with my classmates to shoot scenes for our final project. It’s four in the morning and I can’t sleep. While the others are zzzzzing soundly. Think it’ll take three more dragging hours til we reach our destination. So… I decided to blog.

I’m blogging using my new Blackberry by the way. I’ve got 18 songs on shuffle now and I’m gonna blog bout them. I’m that bored.

The First Thing that Comes into my Mind When I Hear _____ is _____:

Rolling in the Deep
Rebstar Remix
Moksha nights with Angelo and friends. I first heard this song August or September last year.

Rolling in the Deep
Adele
I first learned about Adele thru this song. I was somewhere drinking when her MTV was aired. I first heard the song from Glee though. Rachel Berry and Jesse.

Ang Huling El Bimbo
Eraserheads
Grade 3. I went home from school, turned the tv on and watched MTV. Most memorable scene, totoy and nene dancing the el bimbo.

If We Ever Meet Again
Katy Perry
New Year 2012. Rockwell Tent. Angelo. Bolen Gene. Phoebe. Johnnie Sprite.

The Lazy Song
Bruno Mars
Yasoy and her baby Matmat. He calls this the Kiki song. Kiki- Monkey. Monkeys in the mtv. Get it?

California Girls
Katy Perry
Monster Radio The Morning Rush. Delamar mentioned that this song is the answer back to Alicia Keys’ Empire State of Mind.

Chasing Pavements
Adele
Tiffany Mansion. I just learned recently that Adele really was the original singer of this song. For the longest time I really thought that she just did a cover. I am so amazed with the mtv of this by the way.

Just a Kiss
Lady Antebellum
Iloilo day trip 2012. Maju and I were already onboard, waiting for the plane to take off. But it took years to do so. Must have heard this song at least four times until the plane finally took off.

Last Friday Night
Katy Perry
The spam photo in Facebook. You know. That photo in which a so-called ghost appeared in the mtv.

I don’t Wanna Miss A Thing
Aerosmith
Grade 3. Going home from school and seeing this airing on MTV. Armageddon. Also one of my favorite karaoke song.

This Love
Maroon 5
Videoke nights at Jepoy’s place. His videoke system has limited songs and this song is one of ‘em.

The One That Got Away
Katy Perry
Facebook and Youtube. People were raving about this song.

Gotten
Slash ft. Adam Levine
Monster Radio The Morning Rush. There really is something about Adam’s voice that makes one feel nostalgic.

Hot and Cold
Katy Perry
Hersey. She once mentioned that her college classmate and her boyfriend used to fight a lot that their theme song is, Hot and Cold.

Moves Like Jagger VS Fashion Show
Marron 5
The live performance for the Victoria’s Secret. Goosebumps the first time I’ve watched the video. Again people were raving about this on Facebook. Studio version reminds me of CTL championship game last year. I was so engrossed with this song I even incorporated a tweetums dance move for this.

Firework
Katy Perry
Saab Magalona. She blogged about how empowering this song is.

Someone Like You
Adele
Hmmmm… Kinda tough. Nothing in particular. All I can think of is my Twitter friends would tweet lines from this song heartbreaking song.

Set Fire to the Rain
Adele
Eldrin. We were talking bout Adele two weeks ago and he told me I should hear this song. True enough, this is one hell of a song. Catchy.

And it’s almost six now. I hope we’re almost there.

Realizations 101

The simpler, the better; less is more.

Last year, I received a bouquet of lovely flowers for Valentine’s. That was the most beautiful set I have ever received in my life. Later that day I had to brave confrontations, shed tears, and go thru yet another heartache. My life was such a roller coaster.

Today, I received one long stemmed rose. Simple, yet sweet. No tears. No issues. What made it priceless is the fact that the man you love exerted effin effort to make you feel special.
<3

Masisisi Mo ba Ako?

Masisisi mo ba ako?
Kung palagi kitang iniisip?
Bago matulog hanggang sa panaginip
Ultimo pagkamulat ng mata ay ikaw pa rin

Masisisi mo ba ako?
Kung madalas kitang maalala?
Nasa kalye man o nasa tren
Habang namamasyal o habang kumakain

Masisisi mo ba ako?
Kung labis kitang mahal?
Yung ang sayasaya ko sa tuwing napapasiya kita
Yung basta kaya ko gagawin ko para sa iyo

Iharap mo ang sarili sa salamin
Nang makita at maintindihan
Ang aking nararamdaman at saloobin
Para sa isang nilalang ng kagandahan

Mabibilang lamang sa daliri
Ang tipo ng tao ng iyong uri
May busilak na puso
May paninindigan at prinsipyo

Paumanhin at ito’y hindi ko sinadya
Hindi ko plinanong ako’y mahulog
Sa tulad mong mala-Bathala
Masisisi mo ba ako?

Ok Fine.

I was about to paste the lyrics of an OPM song that’s on repeat since God knows when. Happy new year by the way. So yeah, I wanted to paste the whole lyrics, but decided to write something else instead. I’m fickle minded like that. I think this is another mental diarrhea of some sort.  This is what I promise myself: I’m gonna stop finding that one song that would perfectly fit me(and how I see love), I’m gonna write one myself. Not now, not soon, prolly later. Later, like X years from now. But I will.

 

If I were to confide with my older friends, they would probably tell me that I’m a nut. For sweating this small stuff. See, I call it a small stuff but still I choose to make a big deal out of it. Maybe I am nuts. I am nuts. Pero kasi eh… What if I’m right all along? That this is not just some small stuff? Is it a matter of life and death? Hindi naman. Ok fine. This is just a small stuff then. So much for the new year. Good effin job.

They say that what you don’t know won’t hurt you; but my Dad says knowing just the little details can kill you.  Ok na ako eh… until…

 I think I’m torturing myself. I over think things. I listen to this crazy love song. I don’t know. I really, really don’t know. No amount of chocolates can help me feel better. It’s hard to… cure/fix something if you do not know what is wrong with you in the first place.

 

Subukan Ko Lang MagFilipino Ulit

High school ako nung magsimula ako magblog sa Xanga. Buhay pa naman siya ngayon, pero hindi na updated. Kadalasan, Tagalog ako magsulat. Noong mga panahong iyon, pakiramdam ko, galing sa kaibuturan ng aking puso’t kaluluwa lahat ng sinusulat ko. Kung babalikan ko ngayon mga pinagsusulat ko, gusto ko tumambling. Ang emo emo ko. Ang daming kadramahan sa buhay. Pag masaya naman, ang daming imbentong salita. ”Tada!”. ”Wieee”. ”Kish Kish Kooshi Kooshi Moosh Moosh”. Ang daming dot dot dot (…). Noong mga panahong yun, akala ko bonggang bongga mga pinagsusulat ko. Ang dami ring baby talk; pati sa pagsusulat, pa-baby. Pasensiya, high school eh.

Tinamad ako paglipas ng ilang taon. Pero nablog ko pa ang JS Prom and High School Graduation namin. Pati yata ang Kumon days at first few semesters ng college ko. Naaalala ko, nagupload pa ako ng screenshot ng pagiging Dean’s Lister ko.

Nung nabaduyan na ako sa Xanga, lumipat ako dito sa WordPress. Bilang pakulo sa aking bagong silang na blog, sabi ko sa sarili ko: ”sige pure English tayo dito.” Kalaunan, na-nosebleed ako. Iba pa rin kasi ang Pinoy at baklang humor. Eh ang bakla bakla ko pa man din magsalita sa totoong buhay. Pacute pa, nadala ko up to recently ang pagbaby talk slash TagLish ko from high school. Kung hindi pa naimbyerna mga mature kong officemates baka malakas pa rin ako magbaby talk and TagLish ngayon.

Nakakamiss magsulat. Mapa-English o Filipino. Nung nag-enroll ako etong Hunyo, nahirapan ako nang bonggang bongga sa mga unang aktibidades. Magsulat daw. Gorabels. Ang English article, limang minuto, walang bura bura tapos agad. Ang Filipino article, hala jusko, pahinto hinto ako kakatanong kay klasmeyt ”what’s ___ in Tagalog?”, ”How do you say the sentence _____ in Tagalog?”.Paraakong mga Kumon kinder students ko na taga-Xavier at taga-ICA na hindi exposed sa wikang Filipino. At nakakasira ng train of thought. Ang train of thought ko na kadalasan English na.

—–

Ngayon ay Disyembre 25. Merry Christmas! Nakakaloka lang, sa Facebook, yung mga friends ko, 24 pa lang kung makapag Merry Xmas, wagas.

Iniisip ko kung saan ako ng Xmas season noong mga nakaraang taon. 2006, first Xmas na boyfriend ko si Dan. Wala lang, di ko matandaan anyare. 2007, he gave me my Esprit watch. Wow, 4 years old na yung butterfly watch ko. 2008, medyo malungkot itong taon na to, naaksidente si Daddy; muntik na siya magPasko sa Orthopedic. 2009, patay naman Lola ko; sa Lucena kami nagPasko, kalilibing lang niya ng 24, o 23 ba yun. 2010, double pay holiday; sa Sykes na ako nito. Potluck lunch kasama ang wavemates ko. 2011, medyo busy. Christmas parties at reunions kaliwa’t kanan. Tapos feeling big girl na kaya hala, kung uminom ng alak, unlimited.

 

 

Taong 2011, ang daming bago. Ang dami kong nakaalitan, nakaaway sa opisina. Eventually, nagbati naman kami at naging close friends. Natanggap na nilang taklesa lang talaga ako. Ay meron pala akong nakaalitan, di ko na ginawang kaibigan ulit. Sobrang foul ng ginawa niya eh.

Lagi rin ako nalalagay sa kru kru na sitwasyon o awkard moments. Di ko nalang elaborate kung kailan at kung sino sino ang mga sangkot. Kasal naman na sila at magkakaanak na. #alamna

First half ng taon, parang TV ang lovelife ko. Maraming stations. Palipat-lipat ng boylet. Pagsapit ng Hulyo, hindi ko inaasahan, malamang di rin niya inaasahan, nag-iba ihip ng hangin. Naging bintilador ang lovelife ko, steady. So far so good. Di ko siya boyfriend, pero masaya. Walang drama, walang sakitan- mapapisikal o emosyonal.  Sabi ni God tama na raw kasi yung ilang taong pagiging kawawa ko sa nakaraang relasyon ko eh. Dahil jan, busog siya sa di lang sa pagkain, pati na rin sa pagkain na may kalakip na nakakalokang post-its.

Then came my breakfast family. Pwera si Kuya sa first row,  leftmost.

Kaya siguro ako lumobo sa 112lbs. Mga spandex shirts ko, di ko na masuot. Mga pantalon ko, putok na. Kailangan ko na tuloy magdiet ulit at tumakbo takbo.

Atsaka naman kasi, etong mga ‘to rin, kung makayaya kumain, kada-dalawang oras, gusto kumakain kami. Ako naman, hindi marunong tumanggi. Ok lang, I love them to bits.

 

Ika nga ni Pareng Chito Miranda, di ko alam kung paano to tatapusin kaya ganito nalang bigla na lang mawa

when I wanna say something that I don’t want it to be read right away

I am sitting here right next to you, you’re working and I’m, well, blabbing on this blog using your Blackberry. I wanted to tweet “Here I am sitting next to you, not much words spoken, only exchange of some sort of our secret code and some occasional questions answered by yes, no, or ok.. Yet I feel content.” So yeah, it’s so long and I don’t wanna use twitlonger for that. Plus it’s too cheesy to post on twitter. I’m shy like that.

Have I told you how much you inspire me to be a better person? You’re like Steve Jobs, minus the temper. So if you would allow me, damn, can I like be close with you for a little longer? I will do my very best to reciprocate all the sunshine you’re shining on me.